Four Seasons in One Day

Or, in other words, we’ve had storms, sunshine, frost and blustery wind all in the space of 5 days

It’s been a messy sort of week with lots of different emotions each day and, quite frankly, my head feels like a hurricane has whirled so fast inside it that my brain’s been left in bits upside down and back to front. This is going to be somewhat of a messy post, a bit like my head at the moment.

The storms came in the form of, I suppose, me not feeling on top of the world (PMT!) and Pickle picking up on that. She’s a very astute little girl and there’s definitely a connection between us. We have a very similar sense of humour, funny and a bit bonkers, but she can also be a bit mardy which (yes, my hand is up!) I can be like too. So we do tend to pick up on each others moods quite a bit. When it’s good it’s brilliant, when it’s bad it’s miserable! Thankfully the storm this week only lasted one day and we both fought through it, with the help of my mum and dad who popped in and I burst in to tears and Pickle burst in to a smile. Thank goodness for nanny and papa! They are the blue sky in these occasional storms!

The frost comes in the form of rejection. Not total rejection, thankfully, but when Daddy P arrives home after she’s had a really positive day with me and then starts whinging, pushing him away and being clingy to me I find it heartbreaking. I do take comfort from the fact that they have a great day together when I’m working on a Saturday (usually 11 hours) so he gets a chance to get that attachment going. And he’s fine about it and takes a more pragmatic approach to it saying that time will sort it out. And I’m sure he’s right, it’s just hard to see outside when the frost is covering the windows.

But then the sunshine comes out and, if we’re really lucky, the fun of the blustery wind comes along. And we’ve had equal quantities of that this week too. I picked up and felt better and so did Pickle and tonight things felt really good. I’d got stranded at my Mum and Dad’s (2 buses refused the buggy!) so Daddy P had to pick us up. As soon as he walked in the door Pickle went up to him to show him something and he picked her up. She allowed him to hold her for an eternity without struggling to get down and then we all went upstairs to see the new carpets (exciting stuff) where she discovered her Nanny and PaPa’s bed and the fact she could fling herself all over it without hurting herself! We were all I’m stitches and then I had a go and she copied! It was a moment in time that I don’t want to forget. My Mum was laughing her head off, I was howling with laughter, Daddy P was chuckling and smiling from ear to ear and Pickle was beside herself screaming and squealing with delight and laughing her head off as she flung herself here, there and everywhere! It was magic.

They’re the sunshine moments which make the storms all the more easy to cope with. They’re the moments that make you think “I can do this, we’re doing alright”. She was so relaxed and confident having such fun! What’s happened this week hasn’t just happened this week. It happens every day and every week, it just sometimes seems more intense than others. At the moment I can see the skies clearing and feel a fresher breeze on my face. And even when the storms come again I’ll be watching out for that chink in the clouds with the blue sky.

And the sunshine beaming through. 




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